Very Good Speech

I have done a painting to commemorate Gordon Brown's very good speech to Citizens UK yesterday.



You can also watch the very good speech right here.

Election Prediction

Brown will get extradited to China over this bullying shit.

Cameron will bottle it and get caught trying to flee wearing a false moustache and carrying an old suitcase full of ladies' underwear.

Boris will see this as his chance and "form-up" in the manner of the Power Rangers to become over three hundred feet tall. He'll stride down the wider streets of London saying, in his booming giant's voice, "Who would dare not vote for me?"

In the end no one votes for him and he'll skulk off out to sea grumbling.

At this point Brown will return having grown a big horrible beard because he's been tortured. He's just in time to stop the nuclear bomb!

Everybody throws a big party for Brown.

Brown Comedy

Larry David plays Gordon Brown in a new comedy. Sarah Brown is played by Cheryl Hines.

Excerpt: In this scene Gordon and Sarah are talking in the kitchen of their palatial Santa Monica home. Sarah has a copy of the Sun newspaper and is dismayed by the front page.

Gordon: [Eating a yoghurt] Mm! You know Lewis' new girlfriend makes these. Very tasty. Pretty... pretty...

Sarah: Larry...

G: Pretty... pretty...

S: Larry...

G: Prettaaaayyyy...

S: Larry!

G: Pretty good. What?

S: Have you seen this article in the Sun?

G: The Sun? What's that?

S: It's an English newspaper. It says that you insulted the mother of a soldier who died in Afghanistan.

G: Whaaaat? Give that here. [Gordon takes the paper and examines the front page, muttering to himself for a moment] Oh this is bullshit! I insulted her? Bullshit!

S: Larry, why would you insult the mother of a soldier who died...

G: I didn't insult her. I wrote her a letter offering my condolences – which I do for all the close relatives of members of the armed services who die in action, by the way – and now she's saying that because my handwriting is bad she's insulted.

S: [Examining the scanned copy of the letter in the Sun] Larry, this is horrible, look at all the spelling mistakes and your handwriting is just awful.

G: I've got one eye! Of course it's fucking bad. You know how many of those things I have to write, two soldiers die in Afghanistan every week!

S: So you begrudge writing them?

G: No, I didn't say that. [Shaking his head furiously] It's a nice gesture, I think. I don't mind doing it. This is such bullshit, you can't criticise a polite gesture. You should be thankful for the gesture, thankful.

S: Well, I think you should phone this woman and apologise.

G: Phone her? Uch.

S: Larry! This woman has lost a son, you've insulted her...

G: Alright, alright. [Gordon picks up the phone].

Update November 12: I think that link to the audio of the phone call on the Sun website has stopped working. Here's a transcript.